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The American Sperm Protection Act

Posted on : 01-08-2013 | By : Guest Blogger | In : GOP, Governor Pat McCroy

Tags: , , , , , , ,

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Guest post by Brenda Cornwell

SB353The newly signed North Carolina Motorcycle Safety bill reads in part:

“A person who causes a motorcycle operator to change travel lanes or leave that portion of any public street or highway designated as travel lanes shall be responsible for an infraction and shall be assessed a fine of not less than two hundred dollars ($200.00). A person who violates subsection (a) of this section that results in a crash causing property damage or personal injury to a motorcycle operator or passenger shall be responsible for an infraction and shall be assessed a fine of not less than five hundred dollars.”

Subsection ridiculous:

Unless of course that motorcycle rider happens to be female and might reasonably be considered to be headed to a Planned Parenthood clinic, then this law cannot and will not be enforced.

OK, subsection ridiculous is my own invention but you get the point.

This is part of the verbiage of SB353 signed into law by the same North Carolina Governor McCroy who pledged NOT to sign any abortion bills. He thinks because it is a motorcycle safety bill, we are all so gullible to consider his promise to remain unbroken.

As we all know, SB353 also contains severe restrictions on access to legal abortion services in NC, including access to the morning after pill. FYI, the morning after pill is a contraceptive…NOT an abortion drug…that prevents implantation of a fertilized egg to the uterus.

So now I would like to propose my own bill to the state of NC. I will call it LL19. (Lady Liberals 19 simply because 19 is my favorite number.)

LL19 reads as such:

Any woman in North Carolina who becomes pregnant and might seek to terminate said pregnancy is given the option to identify the sperm donor.

  1. Said sperm donor must undergo a DNA test if he denies being sperm donor. Sperm donor will pay for DNA test.
  2. Sperm donor is required to pay for all tests imposed upon the female by SB353.
  3. Sperm donor is required to undergo a minimum of 4 hours of training in sex education and STD and is required to demonstrate the ability to put on a condom to a licensed physician.
  4. A married sperm donor that had been determined to be donating to someone other than his lawful wife will be registered with the state of North Carolina as a serial sperm donor.
  5. Any sperm donor that has been identified as a serial sperm donor or any sperm donor that does not comply with the law will be required to undergo a vasectomy.
    1. Amend section 5) to include any sperm donor (found guilty by a court of law) to have donated to a female forcibly or against her will.

If I fail in my quest to get LL19 passed and signed by the governor, my fall back plan is to open a burqa shop in Raleigh, NC. (I’ll be needing a few investors if you know of any.)

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